By popular demand, here are 19 foolproof ways to become a pathetic network marketer:

1. Chase down complete strangers you know nothing about and start telling them all about your fantabulous, most wonderful life-changing product that they just can't survive without.

2. Call all your friends from high school or college (even if you haven't spoken to them in 20 or 30 years) and insist on them tasting your mega-duper enzymatic jungle juice.

3. Accost your neighbor in his driveway as he's leaving for work and tell him if he drinks your magic juice and joins your biz-opp, he'll never have to get out of bed early for work again!

4. Send an outrageously lengthy email extolling the virtues of your MLM company and have the nerve to follow it up with a phone call to discuss what they thought of it.

5. Buy genealogy leads and call them - every…last…one!

6. Set up a booth at a job fair and invite unemployed people to join your business opportunity!

7. Pester Granny to buy energy drink products from your MLM using her social security check.

8. Tell your new enrollees "Fake it til you make it!" (but don't tell 'em you're faking it!)

9. Tell your struggling downline you're going to work one on one with them when what you really mean is that you'll stand guard in a parking lot while they put business cards on windshields.

10. Tell your downline it's a numbers game…that after 99 no's, they're bound to get 1 yes….and they "better "#*%! well get excited about it"!

11. When cousin Chester balks at joining your business opportunity, take it personal and start berating and belittling him. (Yeah, that'll get him excited to be around you!)

12. Admonish your downline member for her lack of success by saying she just "must not want it bad enough."

13. Turn your new recruits loose and let them fend for themselves because you think it'll build character and make them need you more.

14. Convince your new recruit to sign up and buy the biggest builder pack, even though you know she can't afford gas for her car.

15. Take your friend out for lunch and tell her "You're so good at talking to people. You LOVE talking to people! That's all this business is about - talking."

16. Assume that the entire senior citizens choir wants your MLM line of All Natural Tahitian Dark Tanning Oil, and when they don't see the point…you tell them that something is wrong with them.

17. Copy and paste the same cheesy message -verbatim - on each of your facebook friend's timeline where everyone can see how lame you are.

18. Create a gawdy Meme with your name and your MLM replicated site URL and share it on every social media platform!

19. Approach a total stranger leaving a store, follow them out to their car and tell them you couldn't help but notice their MLM window decal (tipping them off that you've been stalking them) and then try to convince them that they should drop everything to go have coffee with you so that you can persuade them how much better your MLM is then theirs, even though you know nothing about them or their personal circumstances or their MLM, and then when they tell you (politely) they're not interested, try to get in their car and keep insisting that they're wrong and try to hand them your MLM business card through the car window as they're rolling it up....and then kick their bumper and give them the proverbial "finger". (True story!)

Well there ya go folks - 19 ways to be a pathetic network marketing loser and insure that you never make a dime...or have any friends...or get any birthday cards. There really is a better way. You can learn about it right here in this FREE report: